Up Front

By now at least some of you know that I am not a fan of practicing on the front row. I've got my spots on the second or third row that I love, and the corner spot on the fourth row for those times when by body doesn't feel bendy or I have eaten like a pig for a day or two. I know you aren't supposed to get attached to one spot in the room but it's all too easy to stay in the same spot for each class.

One afternoon a couple of weeks ago I was in my usual spot: second row on the right (hot) side of the room. One woman on the front row, nobody behind us. Then another woman took the spot in the corner to my right on the front row. Then with time winding down before class began, Florence (one of our instructors) took a third spot in the front. Still, there was no one behind me. So, for some reason, I grabbed my gear and took the last spot up front between Florence and the woman in the corner. 

"Feeling all alone. Thought I'd join you", I whispered to Florence. She beamed and gave me a high five. 

As class commenced, our instructor, Shannon, advised that he was not going to adjust the fans on our side due to a broken switch. Florence, who likes the room warmer than most, gave a thumbs up. 

"Yikes. What did I just do?", was my thought. 

So, off we went. As we started the second set of Pranayama, a regular front row student came in and, finding no room up front, took my original spot in the second row. 

"Damn! I knew I should have stayed put!". Quickly I calmed down and got on with the class. 

The biggest advantage to being up front is obviously getting an unobstructed view of yourself. Extra important for me since things are blurry without my glasses. Up front, you're not looking past people. It truly is easier to focus in on yourself. It also sucks, especially when I look at my body. As stated before, I hate looking in any mirror: studio, bath, or otherwise. Negative thoughts creep in about my shape, my weight, my lack of balance, etc. On the front row it was worse, especially when practicing next to or in front of such proficient students. Example: in Standing Head-to-Knee I know these ladies are all kicking out beautifully while I'm fumbling about trying to grab my foot while keeping my knee locked. In Standing Bow I know they are all rock steady while I'm working hard to keep my balance and not crash into one of them. As in many areas, I felt like I really did not belong in the front row. I felt out of place. 

The other big reason is that the heat always seems more intense up front. Now I like the hot side of the room, but on the front row it's REALLY hot. Why? Because the heat bounces off the mirrors and back at you. When the fans are on higher settings, the heat comes off the mirrors even faster. It's like being in a convection oven! Now, I sweat a lot in class, but I swear it was even worse in the front row. My work-study partner says she feels her skin get hotter when she is next to the mirrors. 

I made it through the class pretty well. I did lay out during stretching - I simply had nothing left. Being up front, and practicing alongside an instructor, did make me give a more honest effort and my postures were, in fact, better. No taking it easy in a posture. No sitting out Triangle. No doing only one set of Rabbit. 

Taking a chance and moving up front must have done something inside me as well. Why? Well this past Thursday I was able to take an extra class (normally it is tough to make a Thursday). There was a lady in my normal spot on the second row, so I just took a spot a couple of paces to her right. After a few minutes, I thought, "What the hell", and moved up to the front row and assumed Savasana. When the lights came on, I rose up to discover that the lady in question had followed me up to the front row. 

You never know how your actions affect others...

Namaste.  

PS: Last week I was on the front row for a third time... What is going on?...

Nerves

It's the night before I start again.

Tomorrow, I plan to be back in the hot room and starting back down the path of a regular Bikram yoga practice.

I'm nervous, to say the least. It's been 27 months since I had a regular practice. I've taken some classes here and there but my life has been largely void of yoga, or anything fitness related, in some time.

Stopped by the clinic and had my weight and blood pressure checked (253 and 126/84). BP is good and, surprisingly, I weigh less now than when I was first introduced to yoga. Still, long way to go.

I know I can do this.

I will persevere. I will work and stretch and breathe. I will succeed.

After a long detour, I'm back on the road.

If you're interested, follow along with me. Find your own mat. Get back on it. We can do it together.

Ready?

Begin.


***   ***   ***   ***   ***   ***   ***   ***

There is one thing I am sure of. Tomorrow, I will take class with a heavy heart. One of my first Bikram instructors passed away a few days ago. She taught some of the toughest classes I've ever taken (she held poses seemingly forever at times, and would turn the fans off at the start of class so things would get extra juicy). She also loved to play her guitar and sing and had a great laugh. She left us far too soon, and I will be thinking of her while in class.


Namaste.

The Sumits Experiment -- Conclusion

As I feared, I was only able to get to class twice in the last week of my intro package at Sumits. On top of that, I had to do a double just to accomplish that. Last Wednesday, I went to the 5:30AM class and found that my body was VERY stiff and inflexible. Just moving into and out of up/down dogs was torture. I got through the class, and by the end of it I felt pretty good. Since I had the day off from work, I decided that a second class was possible. After cleaning house, running errands and making sure I was sufficiently hydrated, I got back to the studio for the 4PM class.

What a difference. I breezed through warm up and the standing series. I felt like I used to feel when I was practicing regularly at Bikram. The flow part of class wasn't that bad either. Even allowed myself a little smile as we transitioned to the floor. From there it became more difficult, but I still had a much easier time. I could literally feel my hips open more, my breathing was more in tune, and I was much more focused throughout the second class. When I got home I was very sore, but it was that good, honest, "I really accomplished something today" kind of sore. Over the next couple of days, my hips and back felt so much better!

What did I learn?

I learned that I could actually perform this type of yoga. It is, in my opinion, just as strenuous (if not more) as a Bikram class. It may be10 minutes shorter, but I think you do more in a Sumits class. In Bikram, you are asked to do 26 postures to your maximum with a (brief) rest period between each. In Sumits, you stack postures one on top of the other, which keeps your heart and lungs working harder for longer periods. The third flow set only lasts 3 1/2 minutes, but it is the most difficult and I am gassed when it is completed -- if I can get through it without stopping. Each type tests you in their own special ways.

Other differences?

In Bikram the postures are the same every day. In Sumits the postures and flows are the same every day, until you get close to the end. When you get Head to Knee with Stretching, there can be variations. For example, you do the basic pose starting with the right leg and then the left, then stretch both legs out, grab your big toes and pull. After that, the instructor might call for a butterfly -- legs folded, elbows to knees while continuing to grab the toes and pull. Then, you may be asked to go into a half-lotus and pull, then another half-lotus for the opposite leg. The other big difference comes after moving to the floor, where it's time for crunches. Sometimes its 10 straight crunches, sometimes its 10 straight, then 10 obliques to the right and 10 to the left. Sometimes, its 15 each. Guess it depends on how the instructor feels. After the crunches come the "bicycles" -- legs in the air kicking with elbow to opposite knee. I know I need them, but they are my least favorite parts of the class. Then there is the temperature in the room. At Bikram, some instructors would turn off the ceiling fans and maybe crack the doors an inch at Savasana. At Sumits, the door gets opened at least three different times for 30-45 seconds, and the fans are always on. Seems like they have been told to try and keep the heat at exactly 105 degrees. The last big difference is that the instructors incessantly tell us to, "Have fun!! This isn't the end of the world. There is no competition. Do your best. Honor yourself. If you need to take a break, move to Savasana or Child's Pose and meet us back in Down Dog. HAVE FUN!!". They are just as knowledgeable and supportive as any Bikram instructor I've known but they seem a bit nicer.

So, I would call this "experiment" an unqualified success. In my opinion, if Bikram and Sumit were to join forces, they would be unstoppable. If I could open my dream studio, one would have access to both forms. If I could afford to do so, I would take classes at both studios -- Bikram one day, Sumits the next. I could work on each individual postures at Bikram, then incorporate it into the Sumits class the next day. It would be absolute bliss. Back here in the real world though, I am aiming to purchase a longer duration package at Sumits (after the holidays) while securing perhaps a 10 or 30 class card at Bikram  --  I can't forget my yoga "roots". Besides, as much fun as being at Sumits is, it just makes me miss Bikram that much more.


Namaste.

Unhappy Bikram Birthday

Tomorrow, April 13, will be my third Bikram Birthday. It was on April 13, 2009 that I ventured into the Torture Chamber for the first time. Sometimes, it seems like only yesterday. Now, it seems like centuries ago.

I still remember it well:

Walking into the room and getting slapped in the face punched in the mouth by the heat.

Laying down on the mat and silently praying that I wouldn't throw up.

Being so ashamed of my body that I wouldn't take off my shirt.

Learning that my heavy cotton shorts became ten times heavier when soaked in sweat.

Not being able to even reach my heels in Hands-to-Feet pose.

"OK, how the hell am I supposed to reach down and grab my foot?"

"Does it HAVE to be so friggin' hot??!!!???"

"Slow down... only so much water in that bottle."

"Fuck it, I'm SOOOOOOOO thirsty."

"How do you lock a knee?"

"If I try Triangle, they will have to carry me out of here."

 "If I stay 15 more seconds, they will have to carry me out of here."

"I really like Savasana!!!"

"No, wait, just one more minute of Savasana.... please????"

"I'm bringing a gallon of water (and maybe a 10 lb. bag of ice!)  next time... assuming there is a next time."

"Lift BOTH legs? I can't lift one!!!"

(Just before Half-Tortoise):  "Check, please!!" This is where I got up and left the room.

Well, from that inauspicious start blossomed what was, for a while, a pretty good practice. One challenge morphed into back-to-back challenges, and in six months I lost 45 lbs, lost five inches from my waist, and felt absolutely wonderful. From then on, it's gone downhill -- to the point now that I still haven't taken a class since November. A number of factors have contributed to this, most seemingly beyond my control.

I still look forward to resuming my practice. I think about it every day. Unfortunately, it doesn't look as though it will resume anytime soon. Nothing seems to work out like we wanted, and there seems to be at least two new stresses every day. Even quitting smoking (96 days now) has its problems: my lungs are seemingly always congested these days... a combination of spring allergies, humid weather, and lungs trying to detox make it hard to breathe some days... even with my inhaler. A good dose of Pranayama in a hot room would really help. Today has been really difficult. On the good side, I no longer crave tobacco... in fact, the smell of a cigarette now makes me slightly queasy.

One of my favorite teachers, Greg, always said that part of doing Bikram  was not only that I would feel so much better, but I would realize just how bad I felt before I began my practice.

I understand now, my friend. Oh, boy, do I understand.

Namaste.





 

It. Is. Hot.

Only two classes this past week. I went back to work after vacation and you know it always takes a few days to catch up and get back in the normal workweek rhythm. The great part about those classes was that my Sweetie got back in the room after six weeks! Her work schedule had been horrid (six day workweeks) and there had been precious little time for her to do much of anything. She had been missed at the studio, and it was great to have her back, practicing near me!

The biggest enemy to practicing right now is the heat. No, not the heat of the room, the heat outside. Today will be the 23rd straight day where the high temperature hits 100 (38 C) or more. Worse, there is no end in sight, with highs predicted to reach 106 (41 C) in the coming days.

With these extreme temps, it is even harder than normal to stay properly hydrated. Last Tuesday, I drank 3.5 liters of water during the day before the evening class... I drank 4 liters after class. The next morning, I still felt dehydrated. Thursday was better, but I still drank almost 6 liters of water/Gatorade that day. The two classes last week were really tough. My hips and legs screamed at me both nights... don't know if my body is finally beginning to open up or I wasn't hydrated enough.

I could go to class this afternoon, but have decided to take an extra day to rest before going back in  tomorrow night.

I cannot wait for that first good cold front of the fall to get here!!

In the meantime... hydrate!! 

Stay cool.   Peace.

71

I will.

Class starts in one hour. The temperature outside just hit 101. I had a ridiculous day at work, and I've only had about 2/3 of my normal water intake. Guaranteed that by the end of class it will be 115 or more in the room.

I could take the easy way and opt out.

I could stay home.

I could do a hundred different things tonight.

Nope. 

I'm going.

I will do the very best I can.

I will not judge myself.

I will try to match my body to the words.

I will try to lock the knee.

I will pull on my heels as hard as possible.

I will persevere.

I will stretch and stretch and stretch.

I will not only survive, I will flourish.


If I can, I must.

I will.

Have a great class!!